GAH I HAVE A ONE YEAR OLD

So, my baby is quickly becoming a little girl as she turned one today. *tear* It seemed like yesterday I was in the hospital with my midwife waiting for her arrival and now we are one year later and it's amazing how much she has grown and learned in that 12 months.


It's late so I have to run but I will post a pic!

Write more later!

Update!

Sooo...hubby has been back to work for a week and I have been on my pills for almost 2 months now and needless to say although my life is very hectic I am able to cope well. I love the fact that being on the meds I am on not only has kept me calm after working an 8 hour day and then coming home to my little monkey, but I am also able to clean the house and cook a meal for hubs when he gets home from work. I am properly budgeting our money and ensuring bills get paid, we have food in the house and more importantly I am on top of everything my little princess needs for everyday living.

And believe me, it feels AMAZING to be able to say all of that. I am not miserable, in fact I feel happy for the first time in my life! Very content to be a working mother, a doting wife, and a nice sister/daughter/person of society.

Also, in 3 days my babygirl turns the big ONE. I am happy yet sad at how fast it went. And pretty soon my little baby will be my big girl. But as each stage goes on it's going to be so much fun. And I am so happy that I will able to truly enjoy it.

Back to work!

Alas the sad day has come and hubby is going back to work. But for some reason, although I am sad at the fact that I won't have as much free time with him as I would like, and he is going to be gone 5 our of 7 nights a week, I am excited to establish what is already there as a routine for the baby. As well as make it my own.

I have enjoyed the fact that my daughter has really gotten to spend a lot of time with her dad. And that he has gotten a taste of the parenting experience. Being at home by himself with a young child is an impressive feat. He sees what normally a stay at home mom sees. He experiences the ups and downs that come with having a child.

But now it is my turn and although for the most part her routine and schedule is where I want it to be I would like to make a few minor adjustments. One of them being a change in her bedtime. I want her going to sleep at 7:30 or 8pm and hopefully {seen as she loves her sleep} waking up at the same time the next day.

But this is going to be an exciting journey as we are both working parents of a one year old. So we will see how everything goes. Needless to say I am excited.

Having a brother is like having your own Superhero

So yesterday was October 1st, and for the first day of this glorious month I was able to spend it with my mom and brother. I have not posted about my brother at all so let me lay a little history on this blog.

My brother was born on June 12th, 1990. He is 2.5 years younger than I am and for the first part of our lives we were the epitome of sibling rivals. He was a bright minded spirited child; one who was constantly attempted to be snuffed out by other family members due to exasperation and impatience. But believe it or not, my brother refused to let them snuff out his character and change who he was.

When I left home at the age of 19, I left behind my mother and my brother and in effect tearing our family apart even further. Due to the way I was feeling and not knowing how to handle it whatsoever...I treated them poorly. I almost burned all bridges and they almost cut all ties with me. When I came back to Ontario after 7 months of being away, my brother was very jealous if I had any time with my mother. He had a lot of trust issues with me and was scared I would try to convince my mother to let me live back at home. for about two years after I came home he would shoot digs at me. I never understood it until about a year and a half ago. I had hurt him. He was lashing out and showing me that what I had done to him had hurt.

The story gets better though. My brother and I have a better relationship. All through 2010 and 2011 (while I was pregnant and after my DD was born) we developed a bond. A bond I wish we had all through our lives. A bond where we get one another. We can rib each other and joke around, call names and know we don't mean it. If we have an issue with one another we can talk it out calmly and resolve it rather than spend hours screaming at one another.

2 days after she was born

He is absolutely smitten with his niece and cannot wait to help her grow and learn and show her the ways of the world. When I first had her, his facebook status was : 'Is officially an uncle as of 8:14pm on October 18, 2010.' I don't think he knows how much that really means to me. The fact that he finds it special that he can be an uncle...instead of posting, my sister had her kid, he made it endearing and put his official title. With Willow, I see a gentle side of my brother. The calm quiet side, and I see love.

My mom and brother moved closer to us, they are now a five minute walk from our apartment. My brother came over to spend some time with my hubby and I and Willow and I walked with him back home after he was ready to leave. And because I forgot to call him and let him know I got home safely {due to the fact that my phone had died} he called my husband's phone to ensure I was home.

I looked at him the other day and saw that he had indeed become a man. He is 21 years old and I could not be more proud to have any other guy as my brother. He has the utmost respect for women, he takes excellent care of our mother, and he is not only my brother, he is my friend. And I am more than willing to admit that to the world. He is a helluva guy. And the woman that is worthy to be his wife and gain his love and respect is a damned lucky one.